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Archive for July, 2009
Shot on the Potty
July 10th, 2009 04:23pm by stultzie
Authorities said a bullet from a gun that was accidentally dropped injured a Tampa woman sitting in a bathroom stall. Police said the bullet hit 53-year-old Janifer Bliss in the lower left leg. She was taken to a hospital with minor injuries.
Bliss was sitting on the toilet in a hotel bathroom when a woman in the next stall accidentally let her handgun slip out of her waist holster. The weapon discharged when it hit the ground.
Police said the gun belonged to a 56-year-old woman who has a concealed weapons permit.
The case has been referred to the State Attorney’s Office to determine if any charges will be filed.
FAIL.
…and what do they mean IF any charges will be filed? If nothing else she’d AT LEAST be paying my hospital bill. It was an accident, I get that, but a ‘oh shit, my bad’ hardly seems enough to break even on being shot.
(note: it should be obvious, but the image above is NOT the 53 year old victim. I just like pictures and it seemed appropriate enough ;p )
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Crazy Naked Lady Struck by Prison Bus
July 10th, 2009 04:12pm by stultzie
This story is awesome. Like, SO awesome.
Instead of making any additional commentary on the article, I’m just going to bold the most awesome-est parts!
PROVIDENCE—A woman being driven to Rhode Island’s mental hospital was struck by a bus transporting prisoners after she jumped out of a taxi and ran across the highway.
State Police Capt. James Swanberg said the woman assaulted a cab driver taking her to the Eleanor Slater Hospital in Cranston on Tuesday morning, causing the taxi to strike a guardrail on Interstate 95 in Providence.
The woman ran across the highway without her shirt on and police say she was struck by a bus carrying prisoners, presumably to court in Providence. The woman suffered non-life threatening injuries and was taken to Rhode Island Hospital, police said.
The prisoners were placed on a second bus. Swanberg says the woman will face charges of simple assault and disorderly conduct.
God bless you, you crazy bitch.
And while I’m feeling ’spiritual’ I’d also like to thank the late J.C. for preventing a tragedy such as a 12 car pile up, as I’m sure untamed breasts swinging about on a highway could have been a little distracting to other drivers.
though the poster raises a valid point…
hmmm… to scratch or not to scratch that last comment
now i’m just torn
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From the cover of the WSJ – Mooning Festival!
July 10th, 2009 03:56pm by flipvine
You know its gonna be a great day when the Wall Street Journal covers a Mooning Festival in Laguna Niguel, Orange county, CA – on the front page of the paper. Sarah McBride (the author of the article) – you’re my hero. Let me just quote some of the colorful puns she’s managed to sneak onto the front page:
A Mooning Festival Is Something The Mayor Just Can’t Get Behind
As Town Turns Its Back on 30-Year-Old Event, Will Train Flashing Go Into Eclipse?…This year, the city, on the busy Orange County corridor between Los Angeles and San Diego, is planning a crackdown.
Superb, I have to say, that kind of writing really cheers up the front page of an otherwise stuffy (even on a Friday) paper. For those interested in more details, check out the event’s official site. The site even has estimated schedules for when trains will pass. The event is a yearly occurrence, and marks its 30th anniversary this year. Get this – last year between 8 and 10 thousand people showed up. If I lived in the area, I’d be taking Amtrak trains back and forth just to ride by that many asses. I mean, that’s gotta be a site to see! Here are some pics for you – one “on location” and one from inside a train. 
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Do I look like a cat to you, boy?
July 10th, 2009 03:20pm by flipvine
Do I look like a cat to you boy? Am I jumpin' around all nimbly bimbly from tree to tree?
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