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Posts Tagged ‘pets’

Pet Strollers – pet obesity predicted to increase 10-fold

August 1st, 2009 07:36pm by flipvine
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Kittiwalk Royale One Touch Pet Stroller

I was talking to my friend Nimble (nicknames used to protect the innocent) yesterday over some beers.  She said the dog she adopted with her boyfriend recently is a ton of work to take care of.  In fact, she was telling me that its as much work as taking care of a baby.  I’ve never had a dog.. or a baby for that matter.. so I can neither confirm or deny this.  But I recently came across a website that sells pet strollers – and I’m pretty sure the folks that get a stroller for their pet are thinking one of two things.  The first is that their pet is a baby.  The second is that by jogging with a pet stroller they’ll be able to get more exercise by dragging their pet around in a stroller while they jog/speedwalk/crawl.  The obvious exception to those two is pet owners with pets that are sick or unable to get some fresh air themselves.

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For the ultimate off-road pet experience, Jeep pet strollers!

So yeah, ridiculous, right?  I mean, babies in Manhattan don’t get that kind of insulated bubble-stroller pampering. And get ready for more ridiculosity – guess which car company makes strollers? Jeep! Yeah, no joke here.. take a look at the fancy jogging stroller over here on the left.  I mean, dogs are typically off-road kinda animals, they don’t need a 4-wheel drive stroller powered by a human to get around.  But I guess some pet owners want to baby their dogs this much, so .. eh?!

So, you know what happens when you start pampering your pets like this?  They get fat.  I predict that pet obesity is going to increase 10-fold if pet strollers become more common.  Unfortunately most pet strollers have a weight limit of 30 pounds for pets.  So undoubtedly, Hummer will start producing fat-pet-SUV-strollers soon.

Here are some images of ridiculously obese cats taken from an article on Pet’s Best Insurance. Enjoy the caturday freak-show:

PrincessMeet Princess Chunk, who .. get this .. is a homeless cat that was found in New Jersey. Appropriate name, for sure.  I just don’t understand how a homeless cat could get that fat.  Maybe it has to do with Soprano’s style excess in New Jersey where the dumpsters have enough food to get a cat to this size.  I dunno.

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fucking-china

Fucking China…

June 22nd, 2009 03:56pm by stultzie

is a concept I have been toying around with recently, ya know, for blogging purposes. A series, if you will, as I always find myself muttering, ‘fucking China’ about some random issue or story.  It’s not that I’m racist or anything, I don’t HATE China, it’s just easier for me to feel ’some-sorta-way’ about their culture and practices than most other places in the world. I honestly cant explain why I am this way nor will I defend the  fact that I am; it is what it is.


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FUCKING CHINA 1.

“Beginning July 1, officials in Guangzhou will enforce a new regulation that allows only one dog per household. The law will impact all families, so households that currently have two or more canines will be forced to choose which dog stays and which must go.”

“Although officials have refused to talk to the Western news media about the controversial law, it appears to be part of an effort to control the growing stray dog population.”

“Mass dog killing campaigns and rabies outbreaks are common in China…

As you can see, I have uploaded a photo of a dog; my dog. This is because she was beside me as I read this ; judging harshly, no doubt. As I considered how it would feel to have to make such a choice, I settled on the fact that I would rather kill myself than facilitate a fluffy death sentence. As an avid lover of animals,  I cannot imagine having to make that kind of decision and I wish ungodly things upon those who are responsible for passing such a law. Why does it not surprise me that you would want to murder every other Lassie, Sparky, and Spot, China? This article made me sick, fuck you.

(full story)

FUCKING CHINA 2.

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Don’t think I forgot about your Olympic scandal, China…

(i didn’t)


“A 7-year-old Chinese girl was not good-looking enough for the Olympics opening ceremony, so another little girl with a pixie smile lip-synced Ode to the Motherland…”

“…it’s in the national interest…”

So let me get this straight, by hiding ‘the-ugly-one’  and making a mockery of your national anthem you were doing what was best for your country? WTF CHINA!?  It was both shallow and disgusting and it was arrogance that led you to believe you could deceive the entire world. With the whole overpopulation issue you really couldn’t find a child that was both talented and pretty? I’m not buying it.

FUCKING CHINA 3.

bizarre_magazine_18406_5Apparently, saline injections are becoming increasingly popular in the Japanese alternative club scene. Now, before I go any further, if you’re wondering what compelled me to put a story about Japan in a blog with gripes about China, I’ll tell you; because Japan is guilty by geographic association. Now lets move along, shall we?

“…saline infusion is a gradual process and you become a freak progressively. That’s the joy of it…”

“Inflation isn’t painful, it’s more of a weird sensation – but it is the act of using the body and seeking another experience. It’s a bit tight. If your head gets really full, you feel a lot of pressure.”

bizarre_magazine_18427_12 The article uses words like ‘play’ and ‘joy’ in describing this, not new, but newly popular fad. Had I been the one covering this story, ‘troubling’ would surely grace the page alongside ‘hideous’ and ’sick’. I’m no stranger to alternative club scenes, and don’t get me wrong, I’ve seen my fair share of ‘play’, but this, I just can’t seem to grasp. Help me out here Chin—-er, um Japan. I can come up with plentiful Godzilla jokes on my own without your people warping into his likeliness. Furthermore, it isn’t permanent (which makes you a pussy) and it looks awful (which makes you a jackass). You’re making it far too easy for me to think of things I probably shouldn’t ever say…

and on that note, additional images of prehistoric looking club kids can be found here.

le fin.


for now, at least.

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