- RT @JohnSatino A doctor gave a man six months to live. The man couldn’t pay his bill, so he gave him another six months. Henny Youngman #
- RT @iStupidx haha, no need 2 save my forsaken soul! I dont want 2 be a Christian, I luv FUCKIN’ hookers, strippers, N’ porn too much. #
- RT @DanCanfield Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes. #
- RT @harrisfellman @KayHunter a hot dog tastes better cooked over wood than a mattress – for sure #
- RT @MackLikesCheese @amandablaze Did you have sex with Elmo again?! How many times do I have to tell you he is just a child! #
- RT @amandablaze @MackLikesCheese that’s about as funny as a screen door on a battleship #
- my new hobby is doing detective work on private twitter conversations and inside jokes #
- #iwillneverforget that.. umm.. damn it, i forgot what i was gonna say #
- RT @funnyoneliners: Bumper Sticker: “Flies spread disease. Keep yours zipped!” (via @DiamondSharp) #
- RT @funnyoneliners: Health plans are like hospital gowns…You only think you’re covered. (via @GiggleFlower) #
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